Today’s scripture: 1 Corinthians 7:1-16 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?
My thoughts (Lynnette Pullen):
Sex is a sensitive topic. Many people are uncomfortable even saying the word. I remember as a little kid hearing the word testicles in the movie Funny Farm, with Chevy Chase. He unknowingly orders and eats lamb testicles and doesn’t realize it at first. By the time he figures it out, he has broken the restaurant record and consumed about thirty of them. Needless to say, he is totally grossed out when he is finally told what the lamb fries really are! It seemed like it should have been funny, but I didn’t know what testicles were. We were having a family gathering at the time so I figured there were plenty of people to ask. I asked aunts, grandmothers, grandfathers, and cousins, but everyone ignored me or told me to hush. Being the rambunctious kid that I was, I stood on a chair and shouted out, “What are lamb testicles?!?!” The room stilled. My mother in horror grabbed me and covered my mouth and apologized to everyone. She sternly instructed me to be quiet and never say that again. My grandfather threatened to spank me. They still didn’t tell me what testicles were. We couldn’t even talk about reproductive organs on a lamb without freaking out!
But I think it’s important to talk about. Sex is a way God created for us to communicate love and affection to our partners. It’s divine and special, not bad or dirty. That being said, often and throughout the course of time, people have misused and abused this privilege, causing hurt, fear, and immeasurable suffering. From rape to adultery, books to movies, we have managed to take something beautiful and lovely and to diminish it into a dishonorable representation of God’s creation. As a result, we end up with a society of emotionally traumatized and deeply scarred people, of which I am one. See, while I was married to my husband, he committed adultery. It’s so common now that people don’t even find it to be a big deal. Well, it is. The violation wasn’t once (that would be traumatic enough); unbeknownst to me, it was throughout my entire marriage. At the time, I was so naïve that I had no idea of all of his indiscretions. Let’s just say by the time I figured it all out, the joke was on me. I had never felt so dehumanized and violated in my life. I felt like . . . less: less than a woman, less than a person, . . . just less.
When Paul was going over the rules of sex in 1 Corinthians, I don’t think this was to condemn, but to prevent harm. It seems Paul observed so much turmoil over it that he just opted to stay celibate. I think legalism has hurt us so much that we tend to stay away from hard and fast rules. I get that. I have family members now who would prefer that I return to my ex-husband and end my marriage with my faithfully committed wife because of legalism. That sort of view is harmful and unhealthy. But on the other side of the spectrum, lack of rules and discernment also causes pain. With movies and media being the way that they are right now, we can’t afford to look the other way. We have a duty to uphold and promote the standards of love, loyalty, trust, honor, faithfulness, and joy, particularly in sexual activity.
Prayer for the day: God, thank you for the gift of sex. Forgive us for being uncomfortable in discussing and understanding the gift that you have given us. Help us to discern the boundaries in which you would like us to stay so that we may prevent harm to others.
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