Today’s scripture: Matthew 6:9-13 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?
My thoughts (Ben Lamb):
“Yeah, this’ll be an easy passage to write about,” I thought. “Everybody knows The Lord’s Prayer; it’s a check-off list of items that are easy to agree with. . .”
- God’s name is to be revered
- Look forward to heaven
- Ask for strength
- Ask for forgiveness
- Keep us out of trouble
- We forgive others. . . Whoops! Where’d that one come from?
Well, okay. I’ll forgive the kid who accidentally spilled a drink on me last week at the restaurant.
But, do I have to forgive the monster who molested and damaged me when I was a teenager more than 30 years ago? He was totally reprehensible: a generation older than I, and a respected physician. I guess the Hippocratic oath (“…I will do no harm…”) must have slipped his mind.
When thinking about what to write for this passage, this dreadful period of my past kept running through my mind (which it never has before), so I take it as a sign that I’m suppose to deal with it now. Drat. Compartmentalizing it into the [DON’T GO THERE] portion of my mind was so handy.
The details of the incident aren’t relevant for this article. But dealing with the issue of forgiveness has been quite an adventure.
I’m discovering that there are different types and levels of forgiveness. Some are easy to perform; some are not. This one is quite difficult. I have to be willing to face the situation; it is emotionally painful.
Why did he do it? I cannot crawl into his mind and find out any answers. I have no way to contact him, and he’s likely dead by now. I no longer care why — it has happened and cannot be undone. How I deal with it is now up to me.
I’ve thought about the trauma only a few times in the past several years. During most of those times, my mind’s processing of the matter included the decidedly un-Christian thought, “I hope he’s endlessly and tortuously rotting in hell!” For some reason, the crucifixion (with Jesus not wishing such a fate on his tormentors) never crossed my mind during these moments of wishful revenge.
As I recall the fact that God did not create all of existence at once, but chose instead, to perform the birth of the universe in stages, it seems to me that it’s perfectly okay for simple humans to perform humanly significant feats in stages. Acts of forgiveness would appear to fall into that category, I’d venture to say.
I used to believe that forgiveness included the act of erasing knowledge of a wrong deed from the victim’s mind. One might say a “do-it-yourself amnesia magic act” was a component of true forgiveness. Oh yes, and it really should be accomplished in one simple, handy-dandy instant swoop, too. I now say such ideas are hogwash.
I explored several others’ ideas about forgiveness. One recurring theme which spoke volumes to me was the need to “stop being angry.” Interestingly, nobody said how rapidly the anger must stop. Nor was there any admonition to “don’t ever reflect upon a wrong-doer’s ramifications in your life, nor otherwise let it pass into your consciousness.”
I recall John 20:25,
The other disciples therefore said unto him, We have seen the LORD. But he said unto them, Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe. (KJV)
This makes me suspect that Jesus will forever retain the scars from his ordeal, even though he forgave everyone involved. Now, I don’t equate the attack I endured to what Jesus suffered. But my point is this: Jesus forgave, but the scars on his hands and in his side indicate to me that it’s not inappropriate to retain some reminders of traumatic events in our lives, even though we may not have anger running at full tilt, non-stop.
I’m at a point now where I no longer wish him to be tormented. I doubt that I’ll ever have warm, friendly feelings for the man, but who knows? God will hold a Great Banquet for people like me who don’t merit forgiveness. Maybe my journey of forgiveness is still in its infancy. I believe I’ll keep on traveling.
Thought for the day: Some roads are smooth and easy to travel. Some roads are filled with many rocks and valleys. But if we keep persevering, we’ll eventually get to where we need to be.
We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the guidelines on the How to Pray page.
A message from Pastor Jeff for those who live far from our Church