As you read, consider: What might God be saying to me? Summarize your thoughts in a sentence or two.
My thoughts (Steve Adams):
During my teenage years I felt absolutely trapped in my sexuality. NO ONE could ever find out the terrible secret that I was attracted to boys instead of girls! I had some wonderful family and friends, but I was afraid if they knew the real me, they might not respect me anymore. During my first twenty years of life I learned a bad lesson; if it’s a really big problem, then don’t talk to anybody about it!
The big enemy that grew in my mind during this struggle was fear. By the time I was in my thirties, I had even developed obsessive compulsive disorder, checking multiple times to see if had locked the door, or performed a task correctly at work. But, it’s no wonder! Since the onset of puberty, each time I experienced my God-given gift of sexual attraction, my mind would send a message saying, “That was wrong! YOU are wrong! Why aren’t you like everybody else?” When I think of how many times I heard that message, I see how my pattern of fear was inevitable.
However, God had other plans for me! Through years of being in different Christian communities, I got some practice in talking to others about uncomfortable subjects that needed to be addressed. A gifted and patient therapist helped along the way, too, often while I struggled for five minutes trying to get the words out! Now I am usually able to speak to whomever I need to about difficult issues. It’s not easy, but, God has helped me retrain my mind.
I remember seeing the first Rocky movie when I was a young Christian, and really identifying with the theme of victorious deliverance. Rocky worked hard, fell short, make mistakes, but always persevered. I hope that’s how we can be as Christians with whatever blocks us from God. Even if we are never delivered from some of our prisons in this life, we know that, when we see our Lord Jesus Christ face to face, we will experience complete deliverance in the presence of God and our loved ones!
Thought for the day: Lord, thank you that you can give me the courage to talk to whomever I need to about any difficult issue that needs to be addressed. Thank you I can learn to love others in this way.
We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to start, consider the guidelines on the How to Pray page.