Today’s scripture: Genesis 32:21-32 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?
My thoughts (Robert Hicks-Ferguson):
Today’s verse has always been one of my favorite bible stories. Jacob wrestling with an angel of God on the side of a mountain seems to perfectly illustrate so many of my own experiences with God. I don’t know about you, but my faith journey has been anything but a smooth struggle-free ride. There seems to exist a constant tug and pull between my own imperfections and my desire to follow God. The idea that I am undeserving of God’s grace seems to fly in direct conflict with my desperate need for God’s grace and mercy. At times I am stubborn and believe myself to be self-reliant and at the same time always keenly aware that I am nothing without Gods power.
This Jacob of the Old Testament resonates with me like no other bible character. If there is one theme that follows Jacob throughout the stories we read about him, it is that he is always trying to manufacture his own blessings. At birth Jacob grabbed his twin brother Esau’s heel as if to pull him back into the womb in an effort to be the first born, a position of prominence in the Hebrew family. Which was cause for him to be given a name that means Schemer or cheater. Later he and his mother would wrestle against his father to obtain the blessing of the first born. He even wrestled with one of his uncles in order to obtain over property and land. It is fair to say that Jacob was not accustomed to relying on God for his blessings.
Now we find Jacob coming back to meet his brother. A brother that he wronged so many years ago. He was afraid of what this reunion might bring. He was alone, scared and in a dark place. Have you ever been in a dark place? During those times it’s easy to try and negotiate with God. I’m not so bad God. I have done so many things that were good. Some of those things were done in your name. I want you to bless me like this…not like that. We are wrestling with God.
There is a difference between wrestling and clinging. To “wrestle” is to contend and fight for dominance. However, to “cling” is to hold on to, to grasp in desperation. In our reading today the angel knew that morning light was breaking, and instructed Jacob to let him go. Jacob responded in verse 26, “I will not let thee go, except Thou bless me.” He was persistent in his prayer; persistent in his plea; serious in his request from God. I believe this marked a change which had transpired in Jacob’s heart. Jacob was now holding on in faith, rather than wrestling in fear. God was moved by the persistence of Jacob.
God blessed him because Jacob was ready to receive the blessing. What a blessing! “What is your name?” God asked. “Who are you?” As Jacob hung on in pain, he answered, “I’m Jacob, the schemer, the one who grabs from behind, the scared mama’s boy, the con-man, the self-centered, self-serving, self-sufficient one!” Then God said, “Thy name shall be called no more Jacob, but Israel: because you have struggled with God and overcome.” It was as if God was saying, “This is who you were, but from now on you are the one who prevails with God, not wrestles without God!”
Perhaps you see yourself in Jacob. You are in the night of your struggle, feeling all alone, scared, and afraid. Are you tired of wrestling? Are you ready to acknowledge your weakness? Are you ready to start clinging?
Thought for the day: When you wrestle with life you are indeed wrestling with God. Surrender your heart and life to Jesus Christ.
We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the suggestions on the How to Pray page.