Just Be – Charlotte Egler

Today’s scripture: Colossians 4:2 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?

My thoughts (Charlotte Egler):

So much has happened since I last journaled about my treatment. My appointment with Dr. Miller required a lot of waiting. I drew a brown cow and wrote “Healthiest Stage IV patient” on the dry erase board in the exam room. Her nurse practitioner came back and did the exam. She was nice and shocked or impressed that I rode my bike the thirty miles to work the day before. My bag hurt my back. If I do it again, I need to look into getting a bike rack.

Dr. Miller talked about not seeing the value in scans with advanced metastatic breast cancer patients. She also explained how Ibrance, the oral chemo medication I am taking, works. She said I could do two weeks on and two weeks off, instead of the labeled use of 21 days on and 7 days off cycle. We also discussed changing my current hormone treatment pill, Femara, to a monthly injection treatment. The injection is given in the hip — on both sides because they have to divide the dose — and getting started I needed to get the second dose two weeks after the first and then monthly injections. When I get my monthly injections, they do one shot in my tummy and then 3 shots in my hips. Two shots in the same hip is way too much. I really don’t want to go back on Ibrance, and they negotiated with me to agree with the two-week schedule. Lord, give me guidance. I want to walk with You. I need to feel Your gentle tug nudging me on the path You have laid out before me. Help me to walk in sync with You.

Also, I registered for the Truth About Cancer Symposium in Texas. After purchasing my registration, plane ticket, and hotel, Dawn reminded me that it is at the same weekend as the Indiana bicentennial celebration, when I will be carrying the relay torch through the Indianapolis Museum of Art. Ugh!!! I had to cancel the symposium attendance.

I am so thankful for my family, God’s presence, our friends and neighbors, and the lightening and the rain which give me ozone while I run outside and play Pokemon Go.

I pray, “God, show me what I should do.” When I start to get frustrated, I stop and become open to the idea that maybe I have been asking the wrong question. I feel that I need to just “be.” I must be present, breathe, laugh, and love. Stop the focus on doing.

Prayer for the day: God, show me the way.

We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the suggestions on the How to Pray page.