Today’s scripture: 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?
My thoughts (Julie Walsh):
An excerpt from a letter I received today from a friend in prison:
“I find it truly hard to believe God has a great purpose for me. I feel purposefully non-hopeful as if I’m suspended in a false reality. Forgiveness I have begged for; a change I have pleaded for. To not be alone I have yelled for; to talk to my wife and to have her in my corner I have cried for. For the Lord to keep me and truly reveal Himself to me I have feverishly been on my knees and cried for. Yet all has gone unanswered. It is starting to seem as though I am not worthy of God’s answer, God’s mercy, God’s grace, or favor.
I do my best to keep my spirits up and to think positive; to present myself as if I am able, willing, and resilient but the toll weighs heavy with lament, despair, and tears. Does God even care? Does God hear me? Does God even notice me?”
Though these words were written by a man who sees no sunlight or the changing of seasons, there are days each of us may relate to this sentiment, acknowledging that these words could have been penned from our own hands.
What response could possibly be offered? What approach do we take? Oh, there are plenty of pleasantries and pious scriptures that could entertain us, but when we feel completely depleted, abandoned, and are grasping desperately for purpose and direction, even God’s Word can seem distant and void. It is then we can remind ourselves:
Be still…
The crying, the fighting, the pleading, the yearning, the aching — now is the time to just accept that what it is is what it is.
…and know that I am God.
We don’t need to understand the purpose and the plan. We don’t have to be comfortable in our current situation. We won’t be in this space forever, but maybe this is the space we are meant to occupy for now. God will work it out in God’s time. In the meantime, let’s feel what we’re supposed to feel and empty ourselves completely, allowing God to be God.
Thought for the day: When there is no light in your tunnel, find the courage to accept that where you are may be right where you need to be.
We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the suggestions on the How to Pray page.