Healing through Serving

Today’s scripture: John 19:23-27 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?

My thoughts (Tyler Connoley):

We have no way of knowing exactly what kind of relationship the Beloved Disciple had with Jesus. He doesn’t tell us what they talked about, or what they did together that made their relationship so much closer than that of the other disciples. What we do know is that this man was someone Jesus loved. He loved Jesus deeply in return, and he was there at the time of Jesus’ death.

The writing is so simple and matter-of-fact. The Beloved Disciple tells us what happened, without any emotion. “When the soldiers had crucified Jesus, they took his clothes and divided them into four parts, one for each soldier.”

I haven’t been around any crucifixions, but I have been present on many occasions when people lost loved ones to death. Details like how the medical staff or the mortuary personnel handled the body and the clothes stay with people for years. Those sorts of details can be gut-wrenching if one feels the staff weren’t respectful.

The emotional pain the Beloved Disciple was feeling at that moment must have been horrific. Not only was this man he loved being cruelly tortured to death, the soldiers were gambling for his clothing. He probably wanted to let his grief overwhelm him, to turn inside himself and focus only on what he was feeling. But Jesus didn’t let him do that. In that moment of anguish and grief, Jesus asked him to take care of his mother. He asked him to turn away from his own pain, and care for someone else. And the Beloved Disciple tells us that he did exactly as Jesus said to do. Speaking in third person, he says, “From that hour the disciple took her into his own home.”

I have also seen many grieving families do what the Beloved Disciple did with Mary. In their pain and their grief at the loss of a loved one, they turn to see who is left. Who else is there grieving with them? They comfort one another, and take care of one another. And in so doing, they move out of themselves and are better able to cope. Lately, we’ve been hearing a lot of stories about the resiliency that came after 9/11 for people who turned their grief into service to others. It’s the same principle.

I believe Jesus knew this was what the Beloved Disciple and his mother needed. They needed to focus on someone other than themselves. So Jesus pointed them in the direction of each other. He gave them someone to take care of, someone to help them heal themselves.

Thought for the day: Are you in emotional pain, or in grief? Look around you. Who around you is in a similar situation and needs to be supported? Maybe you can support one another, and in so doing find healing for yourselves.

We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the suggestions on the How to Pray page.