Coming To My Senses

Today’s scripture: Luke 15:11-32 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?

My thoughts (Robert Ferguson):

If being in a relationship has taught me one thing, it is that I don’t like asking for help. Generally that is because I always feel like I can do it myself. This may be the result of being raised as an only child, or perhaps I am just stubborn. Either way, I find it hard to humble myself and ask for help. In relationship, I have learned, this character trait can create lots of challenges. Many times my spouse has called me on the carpet and taken me to task because I never ask for his input on major issues and I often won’t share information about household bills and maintenance issues. As I’ve done for so many years, I tend to just handle these things myself. Somewhere along the road I learned that this is just what a man does . . . he handles it! The problem with this line of thinking is two-fold. On one hand, my partner feels alienated and not part of the household responsibilities, and therefore he doesn’t feel like he has a stake in the relationship. On the other hand, and perhaps more important, it leaves me to worry and stress over these responsibilities alone, alienating the one person who could possibly help.

As I was reading our scripture for today, I found myself identifying with the wayward son who squandered the very inheritance that he insisted on receiving. “He began to be in need.”  Why didn’t the son, at this time, turn back to his father? Because he was ashamed of himself over what he had done. He wanted to try to continue making it on his own, as though he could lift himself out of his own misery. He ends up feeding swine and envying them. This prince of a rich father ends up lower than pigs.

Sometimes we tend to try to go it alone. “God, you have been good to me, but I made this mess and now I will lay in it.” Sometimes we even stop praying. Have you been there? Even though we know that prayer has sustained us. Perhaps we are trying to see if we can fix ourselves first before returning to God. We are too proud to return home, too humiliated. But in our pride and in our lack of confidence in God to forgive us yet again, we sink lower and lower, becoming less than what we are.

But we miss that God wants us to return immediately upon any need of mercy, and that is made clear in the Word. The parable says, “When he came to himself” (that is, “when he came to his senses”).

How well the creator of souls knows us. “I am no longer worthy to be called your son” is precisely how the discouraged sinful soul feels. The son sets out to go to his father, wanting only to be treated like one of his hired hands, so that he may eat. He ends up with a fine robe on his back and a ring on his finger, and as the center of a party.

Thought for the day: What does all this say about how strongly our sovereign God wants us to share our troubles, worries, and responsibilities? The Word says that God will overlook all of our misery in an instant, if we will be humble enough to return. Sooner or later we have to come to our senses and lose our pride, going to God to say, “I need you!”

We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the suggestions on the How to Pray page.