Today’s scripture: Genesis 31:44-55 (NRSV) (The Message) (KJV) What might God be saying to me?
My thoughts (Jeff Miner):
If nothing else, the stories we recently read about Jacob’s family of origin, and the stories we are now reading about his in-laws, should make us feel better about our own families. Where there are people, there will be conflict. And when the conflict arises within the family, the hurt feelings often run deep.
Jacob felt his father-in-law Laban had repeatedly cheated him and that he had no choice but to flee. Then it was Laban’s turn to feel cheated. Under the terms governing Jacob’s marriage to Laban’s daughters, Jacob had agreed to remain within Laban’s household. By leaving, Jacob was (in Laban’s eyes) stealing his daughters, grandchildren, and a large portion of his herds. As a result, both Laban and Jacob deeply distrusted the other. In a situation like that, what’s a person of faith supposed to do?
When I was a teenager, our family was very close to my Dad’s brother’s family. On weekends, we’d often go to their house or they’d come to ours. One Saturday night at our house, four of us were playing basketball in the driveway — Dad, Uncle Tom, me, and my cousin Tommy. Dad was guarding Tommy and Tommy was playing aggressive. So Dad started playing aggressive too, thinking he was going to teach Tommy a lesson. Uncle Tom started getting worried that Dad was going to hurt Tommy.
“Gordon,” he said. “Don’t.”
Dad said, “If he’s gonna give it, he’s gotta be able to take it.”
The rough play continued, until finally Uncle Tom abruptly stopped the game and said, “That’s enough! This game’s over. Come on, Tommy, we’re going home.” Within 60 seconds, Uncle Tom, Aunt Jean, Tommy, and his sister were in the car and gone in a huff.
Weeks passed without any communication. Then one night my Dad picked up the phone and called his brother. As I listened, I heard my Dad say, “Brother, I owe you an apology.” A conversation followed, and later that evening we were together again. It felt so good, so right! But Dad and Uncle Tom never again played basketball with me and my cousin. Nobody wanted to take the risk of another flare up. A healthy boundary had to be set.
That’s what I see happening in today’s Scripture passage. Laban and Jacob literally set up a boundary marked by a pillar of stones. They held a “covenant meal” at the pillar during which they vowed to let go of their past differences. They swore that neither would ever pass that boundary to approach the other unless it was in peace. They invited God to witness their vows and to punish either party if there was a violation. In this, we see a great model for peacemaking:
- Agree to disagree about the past.
- Focus on defining the key guidelines and boundaries that will be observed going forward.
- Ask God to be a witness to the agreement.
Thought for the day: “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the children of God.” Matthew 5:9.
We encourage you to include a time of prayer with this reading. If you need a place to get started, consider the suggestions on the How to Pray page.